All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
