You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
