You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
The beer is more important than you right now.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize