my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Well I just put wine in my tea
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
