you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
