Sacagawea was the original milf.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
