make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
