he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize