I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Enjoy the penises
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
