A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
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