You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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