We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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