when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize