He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
We got so high we made milksteak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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