I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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