Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
