you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
you didnt know i had herpes?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
you never un-have a 4some
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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