Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
