were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
