I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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