They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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