so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
please don't ironically join a cult
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