I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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