just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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