Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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