To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
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Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
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And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!