clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
