Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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