I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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