we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize