i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
