I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize