dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Randomize
