He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
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