eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize