We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Randomize
