another moral hangover. fuck.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Randomize
