Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
