**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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