i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize