So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Randomize
