That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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