Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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