I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize
