What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
thus making me awesome and them whores
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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