that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I just gargled with NyQuil
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
