Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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