shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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