what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
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