We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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