I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
